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I'm on vacation till Sept 9, so hopefully I can meet someone soon and see how we get along. All black kicks to match your plugs in your ears.

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Every now and then, a familiar craving surfaces. You're probably not desperate enough to stalk your neighbors, or to go looking for friends with benefits in all the wrong places bars come to mind.

But offered a chance to reconnect with someone from your past — dinner with your high loiking steady, for example — you might just surprise yourself by winding up in bed. The next morning or even that night come the recriminations: Was Bigger woman looking for friends with benefits wrong to give that person the sexual green light when you had no intention of rekindling the emotional side of the relationship?

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Marilyn, a year-old single colleague of mine, recently reconnected with someone she had worked with many years ago. A few weeks later, she joined him for " a wonderful weekend " in his home state.

I'm in like with him — and that's exactly where I want to be. Marilyn's casual Bigger woman looking for friends with benefits to maintaining a friendship with benefits typifies the mindset of older folks who have reconciled themselves to having "great fun" even if it's "just one of those things. In The Normal Bar, a book I wrote last year with Chrisanna Northrup and James Witte, we reported that 61 percent lookinf female survey respondents who had partners fantasized about someone they had met.

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For men, the figure was 90 percent. And should they be propositioned by someone Bigger woman looking for friends with benefits found attractive, 48 percent of the women and 69 percent of the men said they would be tempted to have sex outside the relationship. Indeed, many surrendered to that lure in actuality: It found that 6 percent to 8 fo of singles age 50 and up were dating more than one person at a time.

The same study revealed 11 percent of survey respondents were in a sexual relationship that did not involve cohabitation. Can a casual sexual relationship exact an emotional toll? For sure, people who associate intimacy with commitment are ill-suited to sex that's as meaningful as a summer breeze; for them, the FWB arrangement would be a bad idea. That doesn't mean all casual lovers feel emotionally bereft in the wake of a purely physical rendezvous, mind wihh.

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Many say they're getting exactly what they want and need.